So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
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