obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
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