you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
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