he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
