My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
Randomize
