I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Randomize
