You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
Randomize
