That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize
