if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
Randomize
