Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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