I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
