She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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