If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
is that a dick in a sweater?
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
