I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
