I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
He is an equal opportunity slut.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Randomize
