so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize
