I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
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