I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
