was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
Randomize
