omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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