Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
