you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
