I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
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