let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
You have to summon your inner elephant
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
Randomize
