There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
