I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
Randomize
