Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
My liver just had a heart attack.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
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