I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize
