Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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