I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
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