Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize