Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize