my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
So here I am, sexting at work.
Randomize
