At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize
