Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
Randomize
