Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
