and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
