I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Randomize