let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
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