making cat noises will not fix the situation.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
Randomize
