I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
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