he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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