Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
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