I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
whose ass print is on the piano?
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
Randomize
