Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
