come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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