I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
