I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
Randomize
