we're blogging at a bar
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Randomize
