I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
