Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
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